1 Comment

Sandus disrespecting micronational norms, say community

BACKLASH: Micronations across the community have been busy penning strong reactions to the Denton Protocol as an air of hostility to the document grows.

BACKLASH: Micronations across the community have been busy penning strong reactions to the Denton Protocol as an air of hostility to the document grows. (Photo: Tack-O-Rama)

Bradford, KR, Aug 1 – Sandus has been slammed by micronationalists across the MicroWiki community today for not adhering to micronational privacy agreements as the scandal surrounding the Denton Protocol continues to grow.

The Denton Protocol, established in a joint effort by Sandus and Zealandia this week, aims to provide solidarity for LGBT micronationalists and a way for said micronationalists to “unite” on matters relating to LGBT affairs.

However this agreement has come under heavy fire over the last two days, with anger directed at Article 3, which states that “should any no-signatory to this protocol refuse to respect the gender identity of another official whose government is a signatory to this protocol, the signatory government may refuse to use and communicate preferred names, styles of address, and titles of the violating official.”

In short, any nation that does not recognise a foreign official’s gender identity will not have its own names honoured by the latter party’s nation.

The article has been accused of flouting the long-standing agreement amongst MicroWiki micronationalists to only utilise micronational pseudonyms if requested that they be used.

Sandum leader William Sörgel has also been targeted after the publication of an article in Veritum Sandus, where Wyvernian Duke Bradley was identified by his macronational name.

Two requests to the newspaper to have the Duke’s name amended were refused, with Sörgel this morning stating that the publication “falls within the press freedoms of Veritum Sandus – per our national laws – to follow the strict example of the Protocol.”

However this explanation has not been accepted by a number of micronationalists, many of whom use pseudonyms of their own, and it has left an especially bitter taste in Duke Bradley’s mouth.

The Duke has criticised it as an “attempt at pressuring their ideas upon everybody else”, and has called it a case of double standards.

Eren Lewis claimed that the Protocol “is not to safeguard the rights of trans people in the community, but be used a tool of control”, while Ashukov Prime Minister Joseph Kennedy has called the document possibly “the most disgusting thing I have ever read.”

Lord Spiritual of Mercia, Richard I, expressed his surprise at Sandus “[running] the LGBTQ+ Gestapo”, and noted that “Gender pronouns are one thing, but risking the macronational political career of one of our members is an atrocity.”

Lostislandic leader Yaroslav Mar said to the Times that he “used to think that [Sörgel] had at least some micronational professionalism and human decency”, but that the publication of the Prince’s name “showed the true nature of Mr. Soergel – that of a blackmailer who respects nobody but himself.”

The USLSSR leader Alex Whitmarsh’s acerbic sarcasm was also on display this evening, with Whitmarsh saying that “It’s not like [Sörgel] has an ego problem … [he] has almost no problems in life, so [he] goes looking for other people’s to try and solve them.”

Whitmarsh backed up his comments, saying that “I’m sure he’ll attempt to ruin my life over some crap because his milk mainly went to the right of his bowl today when he had his cereal.” He then accused Sörgel of “sitting in his ivory tower of ‘being a pretentious prick'”.

Premier Daniel Anderson, one such pseudonym-bearing micronationalist, has joined the growing list of micronational leaders and members attacking the document, claiming it disrespects micronational naming protocols and breaking one of the fundamental rules of the community.

“For years, we have had an understanding in this community that if a member chooses to use a pseudonym, they are free to do so and will be addressed by it.” Anderson said in a press statement in the New Zealand city of Tauranga this evening.

“Sandus and its Red media have shown time and time again that they pay no attention to the views of the community, but to go as far as to publish a micronationalist’s birth name is utterly reprehensible.”

“Every person in this community has the right to choose how they wish to be identified, and for Sandus to go against this after being so vocal in allowing people to state their identities is disgraceful.”

“We stand by Duke Bradley and his right to a pseudonym, as well as all other members of this community who, for one reason or another, choose not to use their birth names for micronational affairs.”

Anderson has previously had his macronational name published in Veritum Sandus, but it was amended at his request a short time later.

Sirocco has a number of citizens who go by dual names, many of whom were asked to choose an alias when signing on with the country in late 2010. While it was policy at the time for new citizens to adopt an alias, this was relaxed in late 2012 as sign-ons slowed.

Meanwhile there are signs that one of the major signatories of the Protocol is looking to break away from it before the ink has dried.

Telegraph reports received this evening have stated that Zealandia is to withdraw from the Protocol, but at this time it is still uncertain whether such an action will be taken.

Links to the offending article have been removed from the front page of MicroWiki, and administration staff are busy discussing if any further action is to be taken.

Two polls out this evening appear to back up the community’s opinion on the matter. A Times poll asking “Do you believe that the Denton Protocol has had a negative impact on the community” had a 8-2 yes-no margin at 10:20 Eastern time this evening, while a separate poll asking whether respondents supported all the provisions of the Protocol has so far seen a 0-11 yes-no vote.

It is not the first time that Sandus has come under fire for its choice of naming conventions. Its long-running usage of the address “M.”, derived from the French monsieur, has rankled some, including Anderson, Duke Bradley, and Mar.

The Veritum Sandus has explained this as arising from “their hatred of French culture or their dislike for the Grand Unified Micronational”, while Anderson has countered this as “bunk”.

Editor’s note: It is the policy of the Sirocco Times to refer to micronationalists by their chosen name, be this a pseudonym or otherwise. While this also adheres to Siroccan privacy laws, we believe that it is in the interests of both the Times and its readers that the correct names be used at all times, so as to maintain journalistic integrity and accuracy, and ensure that the privacy of any persons mentioned in the Times is maintained. As such, we have declined to reproduce Prince Bradley of Dullahan’s macronational name, to ensure that his macronational and micronational identities are kept separate from one another and to honour his request that his alias be used for all micronational affairs.


Rise of Communist micronation threatens Siroccan territories

RED NEIGHBOURS: The appearance of the Communist nation of Otautahi has alarmed the Siroccan government, which holds territory claimed by the new country.

Bradford, KR, Jul 6 - The Siroccan government is tonight deciding how to deal with the emergence of a Communist micronation in the New Zealand city of Christchurch that has claimed a number of Siroccan territories.

The nation of Otautahi, derived from the Maori name for Christchurch, was founded on July 4 by James Davies and friend James McIlhone, who promptly claimed sovereignty over the whole of Christchurch, which includes the Siroccan territories of Greater Hagley, Maxia, Sandford and Trinity.

News reached Bradford this evening of the new nation’s foundation and its claims, and already those in government are nervously planning their next moves.

The news is a humiliating blow for Premier Daniel Anderson and the Federal Party, who have prided themselves on protecting New Zealand from Communist influence for some time, and must now deal with Communist neighbours not far from Sirocco’s own territories.

While the location of the main operating centre of Otautahi has not yet been ascertained, any claim within Christchurch puts it extremely close to the territory of Greater Hagley, as well as the outlying territories of Maxia, Sandford and Trinity.

In a statement released a short time ago, the Premier said he was “horrified” at the emergence of a Communist micronation with New Zealand, and pledged “strong action to keep our rightful lands safe”.

“This is a slap in the face to all of Sirocco, and we will not sit idly by and let Reds run riot near our borders. We take this threat extremely seriously, and we are not ruling out stronger action if they force our hand.”

“Our message to the besieged people of Greater Hagley, Sandford, Maxia and Trinity is that we have not abandoned you. These Communists have caught us off-guard, but we will not let these vile aggressors threaten you. The Federal Party stands with you, the Government stands with you, and the whole of Sirocco stands with you. The Communists were not able to take Berlin in 1948, and they will not be able to take Sirocco in 2014. We will get you through this.”

Anderson also noted the irony of a Communist nation boasting a Mercedes-Benz 300-SL as part of its military.

The Ministry of Foreign Affairs has confirmed it has sent a request to the leadership to scale back its claims, mainly to give Sirocco’s territories ample breathing room.

The national NOWAA scale (Normal, Observe, Warning, Alert and Attack) has been raised from 5 to 2, with the Siroccan Defence Forces in both the region of Lindström and Bradford preparing themselves for the possibility of a Red assault.

No word has been received from Otautahi at the time of publishing.

Leave a comment

Micro High movie proves hit for SBC

GRAND FINALE: The Micro High Cinematic Televised Movie Thing follows the gang as they head out into the adult world and brush up against some old adversaries.

GRAND FINALE: The Micro High Cinematic Televised Movie Thing follows the gang as they head out into the adult world and brush up against some old adversaries.

Bradford, KR, Apr 1 – Fans of hit cartoon series Micro High were not left disappointed this morning with the midnight premiere of its long-awaited film adaptation, with many who attended the event lauding the experience as fitting for the spirit of the show.

The Micro High Cinematic Televised Movie Thing made its debut at 12:01 this morning at Bradford’s Ilaf Theatre to a large crowd of moviegoers, all of whom were eager to see the film that has been promised since April last year.

The movie focuses on the cast of the show in their first year away from school as they try and make their way in the world, only to come up against their nemeses from the Wikia Academy for Numpty Kids (W.A.N.K.) who have old scores to settle.

Movie critic Edsel Pinto praised the movie as “a rollickingly good laugh almost indistinguishable from the television series”, noting that “the direction and scripting is second-to-none, and I dare say it eclipses even the most hilarious moments we saw on the box”.

The movie was produced by animation studio Fern Tree and funded by the Siroccan Broadcasting Corporation, who in a statement said it was “great to bring back the show so many people loved”.

Animation for the film was done via cartoon software UIdio.t, which gave the cast slightly different appearances from the Xtranormal days. Despite some reservations from test audiences, Fern Tree defended the decision, saying that it allowed the characters more freedom of movement as well as a range of costumes and movements not available with Xtranormal, as well as full 1080p High Definition output.

The film had been slated to be given an R16 rating, but editing and negotiations saw this lowered to a 14 rating, making it more accessible for the show’s fans.

The Micro High Cinematic Televised Movie Thing is scheduled for international release in Zealandia and Wyvern tomorrow; St.Charlie, Erephisia, Austenasia and Juclandia on Saturday and the wider micronational community next week.

Dates for the television, Blu-ray, DVD, VHS and Betamax releases of the film have not yet been confirmed by the SBC.

Leave a comment

Government warns of Communist subversion in Auckland

RED THREAT: Government departments have been spending the week charting and analysing Communist propaganda in and around central Auckland in order to determine the risk to the Siroccan state. Photo courtesy Wikipedia.

Bradford, KR, Mar 7 - The Government has this afternoon warned of the presence of subversive Communist elements in central Auckland, causing concern in Sirocco’s territories in the region.

In a press conference this afternoon, Premier Daniel Anderson revealed that since Tuesday, a number of government departments and private enterprises, including the Ministry of Defence, the Departments of Land Information, Internal Affairs, and Public Safety, and the Institute of Scientific Research, have been examining and documenting Communist propaganda surrounding the University of Auckland’s City campus.

The propaganda, pictures of which the Times has declined to reproduce in the interests of public safety, contained excerpts from the Communist manifesto, information on Leftist ideologies, and pieces critical of capitalist economies, Anderson said.

The posters also urged interested parties to attend meetings and lectures designed for the dissemination of Communist ideas.

One poster contained explanations of Marxist Communism overlayed atop a street sign, slammed by Anderson as “a brazen insult to our nation”.

In a report prepared by the Ministry of Defence, which oversaw the operation, the propaganda is said to be “of a concerning nature”, but concedes that “[the] Communist publications…pose little immediate risk to the State or its government in Kinross, however steps should be taken to fortify the Auckland provinces and dependencies to ensure that these posters will not promote restlessness.”

Anderson assured citizens that the Government would be taking all necessary steps to further strengthen defences in Kinross, Wellesley, Hobson, Watchman Island and Blacksands.

“We take the security of this nation very seriously, and all Siroccans can rest easy knowing that we will be doing all we must to ensure this disturbing new discovery does not lead to the downfall of our nation.”

The discovery of the publications comes in stark contrast to the report of last week’s Lunn Expedition, which determined the absence of Communist activities in and around Kinross province, and is likely to further the Government’s anti-Communist rhetoric, which has increased in strength and vigour in recent months.

Leave a comment

Reinhardt elected to St.Charlian Presidency

AT THE HELM: St.Charlian politician and founding father Alexander Reinhardt, pictured here representing his nation at the 2012 PoliNation conference, was unanimously elected to the Presidency on Monday.

St.Charlie, Feb 21 - St.Charlian politician, founding father and “old boy” of the MicroWiki community Alexander Reinhardt has been unanimously elected to the St.Charlian Presidency, an unsurprising result for an uncertain candidate.

News broke in the St.Charlian Observer this morning that Reinhardt had been endorsed by both his Nationalist colleagues and the Socialist government on Monday, and that he had been elected to the position on Monday nemine contradicente.

Reinhardt had previously served as St.Charlie’s Prime Minister between 2009 and 2011, and again in 2012, as well as holding positions within the nation’s Parliament and the Alvisi government of 2011-12.

Within the micronational community, he is known and respected as one of the oldest and most powerful voices within the MicroWiki sphere. Also of note in his long resume is his work in organising the PoliNation 2012 Conference in London and his help in organising the PoliNation 2014 Conference in Italy later this year.

Speaking to the Observer, Reinhardt said that he had come to understand his popularity and significance within the St.Charlian state, and said that the union of Nationalists and Socialists was beneficial to the nation.

Reinhardt also noted that he will follow a “bacon-and-eggs” policy of professional yet informal relationship with other micronations.

In Sirocco, both Premier Daniel Anderson and the Federal Party had been urging Reinhardt to run for several months, saying it was the final task for his glittering micronational career.

Shortly after Reinhardt’s confirmation he would be seeking the Presidency, Federal issued a tongue-in-cheek election poster urging St.Charlians to “vote #Senpai14″ or be considered as “homophobic”.

“Senpai” refers to the micronational nickname of Reinhardt, which was adopted after it was featured in an explicit love story, or “slashfic”, pairing him with King Ciprian of Juclandia last year that was met with equal horror and hilarity from the wider community, particularly after Reinhardt himself read the story aloud to participants of a Skype call the story was shared in.

Anderson lauded the result, saying of Reinhardt that “there is not a soul in St.Charlie that is more well-known or loved than Reinhardt, and I wish my colleague only the greatest of luck in his time as President and I especially look forward to working with him in the future to bring our nations closer together.”

SBC National Radio this morning dedicated the Seeburg version of Bill Haley’s hit Rock Around the Clock to Reinhardt, saying “great music befits a great man.”

Elsewhere in the community, congratulations have poured in, both from within St.Charlie itself and from around the world. Sabia and Verona noted that his election “felt right” and compared it to the ascension of Jonathan I to the Austenasian throne last year, while Serendipity noted that Reinhardt needed only to suspend Parliament and adopt liberal despotism to bring an end to the tongue-in-cheek “Bow Tie War” that has seen the two nations try to out-do each other in terms of suits and ties.

Reinhardt will assume the office from the outgoing James Lunam next month.

Leave a comment

Premier opens Bradford and Kinross

BACK AGAIN: Sirocco has returned to the city of Auckland with its new city of Bradford.

BACK AGAIN: Sirocco has returned to the city of Auckland with its new city of Bradford.

Bradford, KR, Feb 16 - Sirocco has today adopted its fourth capital in one year after Premier Daniel Anderson formally opened Bradford for business this afternoon.

Anderson departed from Alston at around 8am Eastern Time this morning, arriving in Bradford shortly before 12:30pm this afternoon.

Bradford was formally proclaimed the capital by Anderson at 12:34pm, taking effect one minute later.

This marks a change from last year’s capital shifts, where Havilland, Rathlyn and Alston all became capital while Anderson was en route to those cities.

Anderson said to journalists from the Times and the Siroccan Broadcasting Corporation (SBC) that he was “optimistic” for the nation under its new capital.

“What we have here is a blank slate to work upon. The nation will no doubt benefit enormously from Bradford and greater Kinross, and I have every hope that 2014 will be remembered as a year of progress for Sirocco.”

The SBC has confirmed that it will begin radio transmissions on Tuesday on the 57.6 MHz frequency, with testing scheduled to take place on Monday. No date was given for the commencement of television broadcasts, however a spokesperson for the Corporation said it would most likely be “sometime in March”.

National Post and Telegraph (NP&T) is working on connecting Kinross’ telephone and Internet lines to New Zealand by Tuesday.

NP&T announced this afternoon that telegram charges would drop to 2 baud (2 old shillings) in the coming week as a result of lower communications costs within Auckland.

Bradford and Kinross have been praised for their proximity to several major amenities, such as restaurants, shopping centres and the Eastern railway line that serves Auckland’s central-eastern suburbs, including Orakei, Glen Innes, Panmure and Sylvia Park.

A power pole and road sign located on the border have been keenly admired by interested parties, with the power pole that supplies the city’s electricity hailed as the “National Line” and described as having “enormous significance” to the power pole aspect of Siroccan culture.

The road sign has been slightly damaged by what is presumed to be passing vehicles on the highway that runs past Kinross, but is otherwise in good condition. Of note is a former logo of the original Auckland City Council located on the sign’s front, which interest groups have said must be preserved at all cost.

Road signs and power poles are protected under the Infrastructure Protection Act 2011, which gives the government the responsibility to do everything in its power to protect any signage or power poles on its territory.

Under Siroccan law, the national capital must be sited wherever the Premier’s permanent residence is located. Alston served as capital between November 2010 and February 2013, and again from November 2013 to February 2014; Havilland served for two brief periods in February and November 2013; and Rathlyn served between February and November 2013, the only capital to serve once.

Leave a comment

Repair work begins on Government Buildings floor

REPAIR WORK: Work has begun on addressing rotten flooring underneath the Government Building's Meeting Hall.

REPAIR WORK: Work has begun on addressing rotten flooring underneath the Government Buildings’ Meeting Hall.

Alston, CA, Jan 10 – Rotten flooring underneath Alston’s Government Buildings has finally been addressed today as work begins on tearing out and replacing failing floorboards underneath the Meeting Hall.

Contractors this afternoon began removing wooden beams and floorboards affected by borer decades ago that has weakened to near breaking point.

The condition of some boards was so poor that they would crumble in a shower of dust when tapped with a crowbar.

Alongside the rotting flooring, stabler floorboards have been observed moving during the removal of their rotten counterparts, a condition attributed to loose, ill-suited nails used when the Buildings were moved to their current site between 30 and 50 years ago.

The nails are to be removed and the floorboards stabilised with screws.

Work has finished for the day with a large wooden board covering the hole in the Hall’s floor, with replacement wood, screws and glue scheduled to be acquired and used to complete the repairs tomorrow.

The cost of the repairs is estimated to be between §120 and §200.

%d bloggers like this: